Camera-Wise

I think my new digital camera is broken.

Seriously.

Every picture I take with it makes the subjects look FAT, even when they are very obviously NOT FAT. I wonder if this is covered by the warranty? Who wants a camera that makes all of the subjects look elephantine? I took pictures of Peekay's birthday celebratory dinner and most of the pictures I took are just horrible.

I blame the camera because there is no way it's the fault of the photographer! And it's certainly not the subjects: Peekay looks great and so does Esteban, yet in these pictures it's like they've become Oompa-Loompa's and that is just not an attractive picture (excuse the Willy Wonka reference ... I watched that terrible movie recently and I can't get it out of my head; it was horribly disturbing, much like "A Clockwork Orange" and "Full Metal Jacket")

Personally, I was shocked by how very large I myself looked. So shocked in fact that I found myself ducking and weaving to avoid all pictures at Peekay and Esteban's wedding. I found that if I kept the camera plastered to my face the photographers wandered on past like they didn't even see me; it was like mosquito repellent. :)

When looking at the pictures of myself I was reminded of the Friends show where Monica was showing home movies and she was wearing the FAT suit, playing younger Monica. She laughs and says "the camera adds 20 pounds ..." and Chandler says "so exactly how many cameras are ON you?"

Damn. I've really got to get a new camera. Or at the very least update my Photoshop so I can airbrush myself. ;D

How Birth Control Pills Really Work

I've been taking one form of birth control pills or another for quite a few years. This doesn't make me an expert, but it does make me semi-well informed, at least about the effect they have on my own body.

Recently (about 3 months ago) my pill prescription was changed to one of the new, "popular" brands, one of the ones that has funny commercials. (That's how I pick the medication I use .. by who has the best commercials.) It's taken me about 3 months of use to realize how these new pills work.

Did you know that the new birth control pills don't really do anything to impede your reproductive system? The way these pills stop an unwanted pregnancy is by eliminating all sexual activity. These pills play with your libido and eliminate any "urges" or "drives." Also, this is a "purge your ex-boyfriend" pill; I recommend it highly to anyone looking to get over a painful relationship. :)

So for the past three months, in lieu of sex, I've been doing my nails, worked conscientiously hard at work, cleaned my room, brushed my dog, shopped like a fiend and many other assorted tasks I'd been putting on hold.

Might I say, too, that my nails have never looked better?

And the 50% becomes an unproven 52%

After discussion this evening with the parental unit, I can say that my map could probably be updated to a 52% because supposedly I have also been to Massachussets and Maine, but I can't remember Maine so I think I'll leave it at officially 50% but know that it might be higher. I am too bloated to really care.

The last piece of bruschetta did me in. There was so much garlic on it that I think I'm going to smell horrendous tomorrow, as well as fight the roiling stomach all night long. Ugh.

The ice cream cake on top of the last piece of bruschetta was probably a HUGE mistake too. Right now I'm trying desparately not to think about it ... unsucessfully, I might add.

Tomorrow begins the dieting resumption. 6 days worth of good eating killed in a single meal.

I'll see your 49% and raise you to 50%!

After Peekay did her map of US Travels, I felt compelled to do it, too. (Yes, all of the internet games that get sent to me, I have to do them before forwarding to everyone else.)

I am proud to say that I received a score of 50% for my travels in the USA:



create your own personalized map of the USA

I followed Peekay's rules of "only the states you've actually overnighted in, but I feel that I spent so much time in the "I" states (Illinois, Indiana, Iowa) trying to get across them that I'm sure it counts as an overnight ... so perhaps I should count those states, too? ;D

For a girl who claims to love the Northern country, I sure haven't been to too many of those states. :)

Thursday Night and "Friend" less

I know that Peekay is very anti-Friends, but I am finding it very difficult to accept that now my Thursday nights have joined Tuesdays (the loss of Buffy the Vampire Slayer) and Sundays (the end of The X-Files) making my week stretch out bleakly, in terms of TV viewing.

I've been discovering my Public Television and documentary viewing side, which is a pretty sad thing to admit, and definitely nothing I'd have ever anticipated in my younger days. Then again, I never watched the news either, but now I'm a "jump out of bed in the morning and turn on the news" gal.

What's next, Depends and Dentures?

Blah-Blah-Blah (but no Blahg)

I've been in a non-blahg place since June 5th. First I was completely caught up in the events of Ronald Reagan's funeral preparations. Then I was busy sympathizing with Nancy Reagan because I knew for a fact that all of those zoom-in close-up shots of her throughout the week was an excuse for the gory media hounds to get their bit of blood. I hate those jackals.

I was truly amazed and impressed with how well Nancy Reagan held up under the never-ending public pageantry, the week long funeral processions, ceremonies and honorariums. All the while the media vultures were exposing her to the constant barrage of camera lenses and clicking of their shutters, sounding like extremely large pincers on a particularly gruesome species of insect.

At the end of the week, I felt almost as drained as if I'd been there throughout the week, but I know that Nancy had to have been ready to drop from exhaustion. However, she never faltered or strayed far from the man she loved so devotedly. At the very end, when she had to walk away and leave Ronnie behind at his final resting place she finally succumbed to a very human emotional breakdown. And yes, the cameras were there to catch every second of it.

Am I the only one who resented this?

I thought that the graveside service was to be PRIVATE? The only privacy was the fact that the rest of the invited guests were left in their seats ... because not a damned one of the media missed that opportunity, the chance to capture this poised and dignified woman at her lowest ebb. I had to mute the television and turn away from the screen because the sight of the cameras glaring into her face, the sound of the mercilessly clicking shutter apertures made me absolutely sick.

I know it will never happen, but I hope that each and every one of those ghoulish media members has that kind of attention visited on themselves during their worst of moments.

Best wishes, Nancy. Ronnie would be proud of you.

Offering Condolences

Today I signed the condolence book; I think it was more for me than Nancy Reagan.

I am very sorry for your loss, and my heart aches for you. I was just devastated that you had to say your last goodbye in front of all the eyes of the world, but as always, you were graceful, poised and elegant. I hope that the incredible number of people who came out to pay their respects to a great man and a wonderful woman in some way helped to ease a bit of your pain.

I know how very cruel Alzheimer's can be. My grandfather died in 1994 after suffering from Alzheimer's for about six years. He was 84 and my grandmother, his constant companion and caregiver, was 83. In a way, they were a couple not unlike you and Mr. Reagan: he was a big man and she a tiny, delicate lady. And again like you, even though she was small, physically, she was a giant in terms of strength of will, determination and the steadiness of her love for her partner in life.

I've been greatly blessed to have seen two such fine examples of devotion, companionship, humor and the breathtaking melding of two hearts into one.

A few years ago, I bought your book, "I Love You, Ronnie." Writing that book had to have been a difficult undertaking for you, but it was wonderful that you did; you gave the entire world a whole new perspective of a great man and a glimpse into a fairy tale, showing the prince and the princess living their 'Happily Ever After'.

Ronald Reagan was the president that inspired me to take an interest in politics, drawing me out of self-absorbed youth into a passionate endorsement of this great nation. I admired Ronald Reagan and I think he made some great contributions to our country, not the least of which was the resurgence of patriotism and the re-establishment of family values. He made me proud to be an American.

Thank you for your grace, courage and wonderful example of the selflessness of love; you have touched my heart. I hope you will continue to use your influence to lobby for stem cell research; your efforts add to the legacy of your great husband.

I think there is a special place in heaven reserved for the two of you.

Please accept my deepest sympathy for your loss.

Poor Smarty Jones.

After five weeks of anticipation, the 3rd jewel in the Triple Crown, the Belmont Stakes race was run. Birdstone, (with 36-1 odds) the horse lying in 2nd place comes on strong and defeats Smarty Jones in the last furlong, denying the world the thrill of a Triple Crown Winner, and adding another year to the 26 years that have elapsed since the last winner.

I don't know if you saw the race, or not, but Smarty Jones' owner is on oxygen and I swear, I was afraid he was going to yank the tubes out of his nose, he jumped so high out of his seat. It was a very close race, but in the end, Smarty just didn't have enough left to defeat Birdstone, who won by a length.

Damned handicappers.

Ronald Reagan - RIP

This morning I spent in lazy contemplation of the various offerings on the Saturday morning lineup offered by the fine people at Direct TV. Unfortunately, my idyll took a severe downward swing with the news that Ronald Reagan, our 40th President, died today at the age of 93 after battling Alzheimer's for 10 years.

He was the president that inspired me to take an interest in politics, drawing me out of self-absorbed youth, into a passionate endorsement of this great nation. I admired Ronald Reagan and I think he made some great contributions to our country, one of which was the resurgence of patriotism. How could you not feel proud when you hear a speech like this?

"The men of Normandy had faith that what they were doing was right, faith that they fought for all humanity, faith that a just God would grant them mercy on this beachhead or on the next. It was the deep knowledge — and pray God we have not lost it — that there is a profound moral difference between the use of force for liberation and the use of force for conquest." — On 40th anniversary of Normandy invasion, June 6, 1984.

On the eve of the anniversary of the Normandy Invasion, he lost his own battle, the battle for life.

Alzheimer's is a very cruel disease, but I never really realized how much so until I read Nancy Reagan's book "I Love You, Ronnie" ... a very touching tribute to the man she loved. Here's an excerpt:

"If I ache, it's because we are apart and yet that can't be because you are inside and a part of me, so we really aren't apart at all. Yet I ache but wouldn't be without the ache, because that would mean being without you and that I can't be because I love you." — 1963 letter to his wife, Nancy, quoted in 2000 book "I Love You, Ronnie."

Ronald Reagan was a powerful man in a serious position, yet he retained his sense of self and his endearingly humble humility, as well as his sense of humor, as he demonstrated here:

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes." — Joke while testing microphone, Aug. 11, 1984

and here:

"Honey, I forgot to duck." — To Nancy Reagan in the emergency room after he was shot by a would-be assassin, March 30, 1981.

I'm very sorry to hear that he's gone, however, I can't help but feel it's for the best ... how agonizing for both Ronald and Nancy, neither recognizing the person who they loved so devotedly.

Rest In Peace, Ronald Reagan.

Working Girl Blues

I started a new job on May 2nd, and I've been loving it, but have been so busy I've barely held my head on, let alone had time to blahg.

I returned to work this week, after the big week in OBX and the Wedding Event, followed by the Memorial Day Holiday, (I'm sure you know the feeling of coming back to work after a week at the beach and a long holiday weekend. It sucks to go back after all that leisure time) only to find that my new boss had terminated one of my new co-workers. And why? Because I can do everything she can do, better. (So I've been told, not that I believe this, and even if I did, I would NEVER say it.)

Do I feel like shit? Oh, yes, I do, boys and girls.

I knew that there would be resistance to my presence by my new co-workers, but I never expected there to be terminations because of me. I feel absolutely horrible and suddenly I don't love my new job so much anymore.

And to make it really, really bad, I truly liked the person who was terminated. She is very classy, very professional and really knew what was going on ... I am very much afraid that I can't do everything she was doing.

Today was her last day and it was really awful. I cried, and now I feel like a real worm. Guess it's time to post the resume again because I am NOT going to be well-liked at work anymore.

I think in my past life I was something terrible, an axe murderer perhaps? Why do I say this? Well, because in the grand scheme of things, I really feel like I'm paying and paying and paying, yet no matter how much I've paid, I don't feel like I've completely atoned my guilt (perhaps because I'm Catholic, and as a good Catholic, you know you will always have guilt. Always.)

Hopefully in my next life I'll work my way back up the ladder, a bit closer to Nirvana (and a Buddhist, instead of a Catholic.)